Well, tomorrow I start my vow. I've picked out my clothes (some of which will have to be swapped out when it starts snowing), I've said my goodbyes to the home computer and my wallet is riding pretty light. I'm really looking forward to this experience. I've certainly never done anything like this before. I think what is most exciting to me right now is the thought of an extended form of worship. I am choosing to make this vow as an act of worship of God--not for what he will do for me.
I've already started to experience some mixed feelings about the whole thing. I am realizing that I have a little anxiety about how people will respond to the external elements of this vow. I had a conversation with my wife this morning where I became aware that I was being really sensitive and thin skinned toward her. As I thought about it, I came to the conclusion that I was taking offense at the things she was saying because I am a little afraid that she might distance herself from me in this process--when my facial hair is not attractive (or comfortable for kissing)...when my clothes start getting old, etc. She, of course, assured me that she was behind me all the way and not nearly as shallow as I apparantly am!
My prayer at this point is that God would be honored by my vow. I pray that he overlooks any ways I have misinterpreted or wrongly altered his Nazarite vow in favor of seeing my heart in the matter. I pray that every day I will remember who I am following and who's approval I am most interested in.
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